Di Caprio, Malkovich and Wu-Tang: Artistic Works You Will Never See or Hear | The independent

The hottest film so far at the Cannes Film Festival is the one that no one will see there. John Malkovich wrote and starred in the film, which Robert Rodriguez directed, and he will travel to the south of France in a safe, where he will stay – or so it is rumored – until in 2115, when the safe will be opened and our descendants will have their first glimpse of the thing.

It’s called 100 years: the movie you’ll never see, which is a good headline now, but a bit of a misnomer for anything future generations will be able to watch – if, that is, they can figure out how. In a teaser, Malkovich is seen in white gloves, carefully placing a reel in a safe. This format could prove problematic in 10 years, let alone 100.

Then again, said trailer looks more like an advertisement for Louis XIII cognac, partner of the film (it also takes 100 years to age cognac).

Does the film still exist? Malkovich began to talk about the film “super and emotionally charged” for People magazine in November, so maybe it does. “If you play in a room, you never see it,” he said. “I have certainly acted in a lot of films that I have never seen and I wouldn’t be particularly tempted by some of them.”

Other creators may know the feeling, if the works below – more or less out of the public eye – are something to go by.

Don’s Plum

These days, we take Leonardo DiCaprio seriously because he is an Oscar winner of the Hollywood elite. Sure, he vapes and dates models, but he also practically kills himself for his art. This was not the case in the mid-90s when he was filming Don’s Plum, a scorching Gen X response to Dinner. Taking place over the course of a single night, DiCaprio and his friends Tobey Maguire, Kevin Connolly, and others hang out on a dive in Los Angeles discussing masturbation and making fun of anyone who walks by.

DiCaprio apparently had doubts about ‘Don’s Plum’ movie

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Most of the improvised dialogue made the guys look like the perverted man they were back then, though the infamous 1998 New York magazine DiCaprio’s profile is to be believed. After the film was over, Maguire and DiCaprio changed their minds and therefore managed to block the film’s release in the United States and Canada. Yet it was created overseas, so it is undoubtedly possible to find it with detectives on the Internet. And in January, one of the film’s producers, Dale Wheatley, posted the full movie on the freedonsplum.com website – until DiCaprio and Maguire got wind of the development and the film was released.

The day the clown cried

If you think Don’s Plum It sounds bad, wait until you hear the 1972 disaster premise directed and titled by Jerry Lewis. The comedian played Helmut Doork, a German clown who was heard by Nazis denigrate Hitler. His punishment: to go to Auschwitz and relax the children’s atmosphere, then escort them to the gas chambers.

Comedian Harry Shearer, one of the few people to have seen the drama, said To spy magazine: “The film is so drastically wrong, its pathos and comedy so wildly out of place that you couldn’t, in your fancy, improve on what it really is. ‘Oh my God !’ – that’s all you can say. “

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Lewis realized his mistake and chose not to publish it, although some footage from the filming of the film ended up online a few years ago. The day the clown cried won’t always be invisible (although it always can be). The Library of Congress acquired the film last year but agreed not to show it for at least 10 years.

Once upon a time in Shaolin

Rap collective Wu-Tang Clan spent six years working on their latest album, but only made one copy. In 2015, the group auctioned it off to the highest bidder and made the buyer promise not to profit from it until 2103 – although the person could let people hear it for free if they wanted. .

Wu-Tang Clan’s singular vision found its ultimate expression with a single-copy album

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The winning bid of $ 2million (£ 1.4million) came from pharmaceutical executive Martin Shkreli, best known for raising the price of a drug against AIDS-related infections. During an interview with Bloomberg in December, Shkreli said he bought the album for the chance to meet and hang out with famous people. He said he hadn’t listened to the album yet, although he could be convinced if “Taylor Swift wants to hear it or something.” Of course, since then Shkreli has had more pressing concerns, such as securities fraud charges.

Basically the good news is that it might be possible to hear the music. The bad news is, you should hang out with Shkreli.

Anyone can read the writer’s three-part memoir now, but the books weren’t allowed out until 100 years after Twain’s death in 1910. Of course, the great self-promoter couldn’t stand it. to keep it completely secret, so some of the stories have been published in North American Journal even before Twain died.

When the first volume finally came out in 2010, not everyone thought it was worth the wait. Garrison Keillor wrote in the New York Times that the book was “a bunch of bits and pieces, some interesting, some not.”

Mark Twain was unusually reluctant about his memoirs

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With the release of the third volume last year, we at least got an indication why Twain wanted to wait so long: he spent time trashing Teddy Roosevelt and Andrew Carnegie. Even so, the book was “one piece with the other two,” Dennis Drabelle wrote for The Washington Post, “Disjointed, charming, vitriolic, confessional (” I love pomp and display “), full of wit, lyricism and regret”.

Margaret Atwood (and others)

Atwood also waits a century to release a novel, and she’s not alone. In 2114, the Future Library will be open for business, revealing unpublished manuscripts by 100 writers. Each year by then, another author will contribute to the work. Atwood’s deal to be the first donor must have given some credibility to an eccentric idea, because Cloud Atlas author David Mitchell has signed on to be the second annual contributor.

A really, really, really long piece of music

You can now listen to Jem Finer’s appropriately titled Longplayer in a few listening posts around the world, but you won’t be able to hear it all. This is because the piece is 1000 years long, so it will not be available for download until the year 3000. The composition, performed using singing bowls and Tibetan gongs, began on January 1, 2000 and uses an algorithm to find new variations on a 20 minute Theme. If that sounds intriguing to you, well, you’ve got plenty of time, Margaret Tawin, to research it.

© The Washington Post

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